Victor's story: how revisiting the past supported the future

Victor's story: how revisiting the past supported the future

For many years, Victor was a devoted carer to his wife, Jean. Caring was an important part of his daily life and identity, and when Jean suddenly passed away following a stroke, Victor found himself facing a future he had never imagined.

The loss was overwhelming. After years of caring for Jean, Victor felt lost without the routines, responsibilities and companionship that had been such a significant part of his life. He had originally applied to the Time to Live fund to help pay for an overnight break away for the two of them, but following Jean's death, he cancelled his application.

A few months later, staff from the carers' centre reached out to see how Victor was coping. During this difficult period, they supported him to access bereavement counselling, which he found helpful in managing his grief. Through ongoing conversations, they discussed whether there might be another way the Time to Live grant could support him as he adjusted to life after caring.

With encouragement from the carers' centre, Victor submitted a new application and used a Time to Live microgrant to purchase a genealogy subscription. The funding allowed him to return to a family tree research project that he and Jean had started together before her death. Both Victor and Jean had shared a passion for learning more about their family heritage. Together they had spent hours researching relatives, piecing together family trees and uncovering stories from the past.

"Jean and I had been working on a project together, piecing together our family trees. It was something that I wanted to return to and continue. The grant supported this as I didn't want to go away on holiday. I wanted to do something that made me think, helped me learn more about our families, and allowed me to remember Jean too."

The transition from being a full-time carer to navigating life on his own was incredibly challenging. Alongside counselling support, the genealogy project offered Victor a positive focus and a gentle way to process his grief. Each new discovery reminded him of conversations he and Jean had shared, and the plans they had made together.

"The support from the [carers'] centre has been a lifeline for me. Simply being listened to and having someone understand what would make a difference was so important. I never thought something like this could be supported through a grant."

For Victor, the funding was about much more than access to a genealogy subscription. It represented recognition of the years he had spent caring for Jean and support as he adjusted to a new chapter in his life.

Through the Time to Live microgrant, Victor has been able to honour Jean's memory, reconnect with a shared passion, and take small but important steps forward on his bereavement journey. While grief remains part of his life, researching his family history has given him purpose, comfort and a meaningful way to remember the person he loved.

Find out more about Time to Live here.